Baby Watch 2009: 11 p.m. and all is ... the same

Well, it's 11 p.m. here in the Land of Lincoln and Baby Hanley is still subletting, unready to move out.
Looks like Labor Day will just be a day for celebrating the years of protest and strife that went into securing American workers a 40-hour work week after all.
Oh well.

In the meantime, enjoy this ode to waiting for babies with gratitude to Clement Clarke Moore.






'Twas the last days of pregnancy and all through the home,
The baby was stirring but refused to be shown.
The bags were all packed by the door with care,
In hopes that Baby Hanley soon would be there.
Baby Hanley was nestled all snug in his/her bed,
While Matt runs runs around like a chicken sans head.
With Ma in her way, Pa's in such a state,
He wants to make sure he makes no mistake.
Because one day soon there will arise such a clatter,
Pa will wake up and know just what's the matter.
Away to the bags he'll fly like a flash,
Out into the car and away in a dash.
The moon will guide him to the hospital doors,
He has memorized the route - he knows all the floors.
But what to Matt's wondering eyes should appear?
He forgot Lynne at home and now he's in fear!
Like an Indy car driver, so lively and quick,
Matt tears home to grab Lynne, lickety split!
More rapid than eagles the swear words they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and cursed his own name:
"You dummy, you goof, you moron, you fool!
You dumkopf, you loser, you short end of the gene pool!
You had just one job, one little task from the start -
Get Lynne to the hospital and you were doing your part."
So back to the house, the husband he flew,
With his gut in a knot and his wife in a stew.
As Matt pulled on to the street and up to the house,
He immediately spotted a very angry spouse.
Lynne was dressed in pajamas and her hair was a mop,
She'd chased the car for a block, but Matt didn't stop.
Her eyes - how they glowered! Her scowl - how scary.
And the finger she raised was anything but merry.
She was flustered and tired and ready to pop,
Matt knew in a moment, he had been a flop.
A pinch of his ear and knock on his head,
Matt knew he'd better get going or he'd have much more to dread.
They spoke not a word as they drove into the night,
Matt could still rescue this mission - if the baby held tight!
But when Lynne gripped his shoulder, Matt knew Baby was near,
He pulled off the road and grabbed his catcher's gear.
He sprang into action and knew he had to deliver,
"This Baby was coming!' Lynne said with a quiver.
But then out of the ether Matt heard a loud scream,
It was just the alarm. This was all a bad dream.


We'll keep you posted!