Mark of Fridays: Ho ho ho!

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

We got just we wanted for Christmas!

"They're going to have Christmas every year? Are you serious?!?"

"What do you mean there's only coal in my stocking?!?"

"I'm pretty sure I belong on the nice list, Santa."

"Do I smell egg nog? Yum."

The three-month Mark

Mark Hanley, at three months
Best friends: Of course I love all of my family, but I'm having lots of fun with my grandmas! It's so great that they come and watch me during the day. It makes me feel like a real lady's man.
Enemies: Naperville Central High School and The Aurora Beacon-News. I know Mommy and Daddy love their jobs, but I miss them! Waaaa!
Just found out about: All these things hanging off my stomach and butt. (I think they're called 'arms' and 'legs'?) Guess what? I own those things! I can move them any which way I want. If I hear Mommy singing 'Here Comes Santa Claus' I can wave them up and down. If Dad's dancing like a monkey, I can put them in my mouth! If someone takes the bottle, I can try to grab on to it. Why didn't anyone tell me about this?!?
I'm not so sure about: This thumb thing. I've been trying it out a little, but I'd still rather try to shove my whole hand in my mouth, knuckle first. I'm sure you usually do the same thing.
Favorite activities: OK, last month I invented with smiling. That was awesome. It's working out great. Everyone's copying me. But that's sooo last month. This month, I invented giggling and making 'coo' noises. Let's see you copy that!
Things I don't like: Sleeping on my back. I know, I know - everyone in the world tells you babies are never, every supposed to sleep on their stomach, no matter what! Danger, Will Robinson, danger!
Pffft, I say. My Mom and Dad slept on his back and so did all my aunts and uncles. Sleeping on your back is for amateurs, and people who don't punch themselves in the face during slumber. When you sleep on your tummy, you can stick your whole hand in your mouth any time you want. How great is that?
I have a crush on: Sleeping through the night. Oh yeah, it is pretty sweet. From 10:30 p.m. to 7 a.m. I am in this amazing place where I can have all the bottles I can ever imagine, unlimited diaper changes and 5 million games of peekaboo. And, if I get bored with staying up during the day, I can grab another two hours of sleep. It's pretty sweet.
Major accomplishments: I can sleep for eight straight hours. I smile for an hour straight. When Mom is walking down the stairs, I can spot her from 10 feet away, every time. Plus, I spent zero-point-zero days in the hospital. Hooray!

Mark of Fridays: They're gonna put me in the movies

If a picture is worth a thousand words, a moving picture is worth like half a million smiles, at least.

Things learned, so far

Recently, a friend asked Matt what he's learned since Mark came home. An interesting question. After some long pondering, here's what Matt came up with:

- The best things in the world are family and good friends. The second best things are: time to spend with family and naps.
- It's amazing how fast you can learn the body language signals of a little person who cannot speak.
- Television is a horrible, terrible invention. Watching it night and day makes Matt scared for this country's future.
- You think you know the words to nursery rhymes, but you really don't. And then when you look them up, they're either creepy or completely insane. ("And down will come baby, cradle and all...")
- Having a baby with you makes it significantly easier to shoplift. Not only does is the child a distraction to store security, the stroller provides many places to hide fairly large items. Merry Christmas, indeed!
- Putting your hand in poo: no big deal.
- Kids don't like scratchy beards. Even sporadic, pathetic, should-be-on-a-teenager beards.
- Sometimes you're proud when your kid is feeling two foot tall.
- A kid who sits around doing nothing all day, contributing nothing to the house, having no possessions and no knowledge, can still be the most valuable and amazing thing in your home.

Baby power!

No, Matt isn't a stay-at-home dad. (Sadly.) But, that doesn't mean he has time to be running around the neighborhood all day. That's why it's good to know there are resources out there to help him stay most physically fit at all times.

- - - - .

Mark of Fridays: Weird baby stories

Once in a very, very great while, when Mark is being especially fussy -thrashing and screaming like the Mets just traded David Wright - Lynne and Matt will think that this baby-raising stuff is tough.

Pffffft.
Please.

They didn't have a 19-pound baby. Or a premature 15-pound baby.

They didn't give birth on a flight from Chicago to Salt Lake City, which a doctor tying off the umbilical cord with a shoelace.

He didn't have a foot in his brain.

So, what's a little fussiness?

Hall of Agonizing Debates

Well, the Hall of Fame ballots are out again. And Matt feels compelled to weigh on who should or should not be elected. Somehow, it seems unfair to judge the worth of men's Major League career when Matt couldn't make the high school freshman team.
But in Matt's defense it's so much fun to debate this stuff! And it is brutally cold out and thinking about baseball is a welcome alternative to scraping car windows.
Now, there a plenty of holdovers on the ballot, so Matt's not going to go in-depth on players he wrote about last year - unless his opinion has changed. And it has.

A quick reminder on Matt's Hall-of-Fame criteria:
One, player should have a decade of excellence.
Two, some semblance of an all-around game.
Three, MVP awards, Cy Youngs, all-star selections count.
Four, no "magic numbers." In other words, 500 homers isn't a free pass. (Cough. Gary Sheffield. Cough.)
Five, excellence in the post season.
Six, and least reliable: the player should make you stop in you tracks. It's a bit nebulous - kind of a you-know-it-when-you-see-it quality. Albert Pujols has it. Mark Teixeira doesn't.

OK, on to the players. (* players new to the ballot)

No way: Kevin Appier*, Ellis Burks*, Pat Hentgen*, Mike Jackson*, Eric Karros*, Ray Lankford*, Shayne Reynolds*, David Segui*, Todd Zeile*. Lankford and Segui should be this year's poison pill players. If you vote for either of them, you lose your right to participate in the Hall of Fame balloting. Vote for Reynolds and you lose your fingers.

Nice career, but not close to Hall of Fame:
Robin Ventura.* I really like Ventura and he's someone I always wanted to have on my team. But he's not a Hall of Famer.
Andres Galarraga. Please. He bulked up at the end of his career, and his numbers benefited from...playing in Colorado.
Alan Trammell. Not sure why the big push for Trammell, other than he's a nice guy. There's dozens of shortstops who were better.

They were very good players and you might have liked to have them in your team's lineup but they aren't Hall of Famers:
Harold Baines. Very nice career. Good hitter. Great? Not really.
Barry Larkin.* Matt suspects there will be a lot of love for the career Red and 1995 MVP. But was he great? A 12-time All-Star, although his last appearance was literally a mercy pick. .295 lifetime average, 198 homers and 379 steals. Again, this is not the Hall of Very Good.
Edgar Martinez.* See Harold Baines, only not as durable - even though he DH'd for most of his career. 300 homers, .312 average, two batting titles and twice in the top 10 for MVP. But he was nowhere near as good as Will Clark, who isn't even considered for the Hall.
Don Mattingly. Great hitter, but not for long enough. Injuries held him back. And just because other people in the Hall had worse career numbers - Hack Wilson - doesn't mean the future Dodgers manager should get in.
Lee Smith. Same question as last year: If there's two outs in the ninth and your team is up by one run, how many guys would you hand the ball to before you thought of Smith?
Dave Parker. Some spectacular years and a lot of below average ones. Did himself in.
Tim Raines. Like Smith, his numbers look better than they really were. He was a very good ballplayer. But among the all-time greats? Honestly? What great moment do you associate with The Rock?

The Almosts But Not Quite:
Bert Blyleven. Hall of Fame person, maybe even a Hall of Fame broadcaster. His stats accumulated well. Still a borderline no.
Dale Murphy. Like Blyleven, a very, very uncomfortable no. But no protests in Cooperstown if he is elected. Two MVPS is nothing to sneeze at.
Fred McGriff.* Twice led the league in homers and had eight seasons with 100+ RBIs. Four times in the top 10 MVP voting and a five-time All Star. A .303 lifetime postseason average, including four World Series homers. No Gold Gloves and wasn't a base stealer. Steadily good, but never spectacular. Always sort of second banana on his team, like a low-rent Scottie Pippen. You knew he was good, but you were never sure if he could shine on his own. Ugh, this is an agonizing case, particularly because he'd get 50 more votes if he'd hit seven more homers. No, but Matt could certainly be convinced.
Mark McGwire. Yep, Matt moved him down even though Big Mac added no new plate appearances in the last year. But it has nothing to do with steroids. OK, it has something to do with steroids because Matt deflates those 573 home runs a bit knowing they were artificially enhanced. But here's the real reason: McGwire couldn't run, wasn't a great fielder and couldn't hit for average. So if you lower his home run total, what's left? Next year Matt will probably change his mind again.

Yes, they should be in, although it's not a slam dunk:
Roberto Alomar.* Every instinct made Matt not want to vote for Roberto Alomar. Partly because Alomar was a jerk. Partly because he faded so fast and so dramatically, but made sure to steal money from the White Sox and Mets on his way out. But, darn it, for 10 years Alomar could do it all at second base: field beautifully (10 Gold Gloves), steal bases and hit for average as well as power. Plus, he came up big when it counted. This isn't the sweet guy Hall of Fame. He was a great second baseman.
Andre Dawson. Dawson could still do it all - run, field and bash - and he did for 10+ years. Matt can understand the arguments against him, too. But if Dawson was a Yankee, he'd be polishing his plaque by now. And he was certainly better than Jim Rice. He's probably most likely to be elected this year.
Jack Morris. OK, so Matt changed his mind on this one, too. Yes, Morris has a nasty ERA (3.90). But he had 254 wins and more than 2,400 strike outs. And, dang it, he was a workhorse and straight money in the big games. Matt says he should be in. For now.

Absolutely, no doubt: Nobody
This year's class is weak so it could be a good chance for a borderline player like Dawson. Or, it could mean no one gets in. But the upcoming classes are stacked, with one exception.
2011: Jeff Bagwell, Rafael Palmeiro, the immortal Benito Santiago, Ugueth Urbina (would make an interesting induction speech)
2012: The best candidates are Jeromy Burnitz and Bernie Williams. Uh, no.
2013: Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, Craig Biggio, Curt Schilling, Sammy Sosa, Mike Piazza, Kenny Lofton. Wow. That will make for some good debates.
2014: Tom Glavine, Jeff Kent, Greg Maddux, Mike Mussina, Frank Thomas, and, of course, Steve Trachsel

What's fun now is that for some of those guys Matt watched their entire careers. Of course, that makes Matt feel very, very old, too.
But why believe Matt?
Keith Olbermann has his opinions on the Baseball Nerd Blog, not that Matt agrees with all his assessments. (Lee Smith led the league in saves more times than Mariano Rivera, so he should be in. Um, Rivera's done a few things Smith never did.)

Mark of Fridays: Ole Mr. Big Head

An update on an ongoing issue:
Mark went to the doctor this week for a regular check up. He's healthy as a horse, only with less whinny.
At 22-3/4 inches, he's in the 25th percentile for height. At 12 pounds, 12 ounces, he's in the 60th percentile for weight.
And that melon? 85th percentile.
He's got a big head. To hold his giant brain.

A real diaper dandy, baby! Whoa Illini!

Matt isn't claiming that just because Wednesday night was the first Illinois basketball game Mark ever watched, and it happened to be game in which the Illini set a school record for the biggest comeback in school history - overcoming a 23-point deficit in the second half to beat No. 19 Clemson (on the road!) - means that Mark is an Illinois good luck charm and that he will go to the U of I, where he will be the point guard on the 2029 National Championship team. No, Matt cannot guarantee that.

After all, Mark could conceivably be a shooting guard.

Oh, and Mark will never know that Matt almost turned the game off at halftime. When he hears the story Matt will have never given up on the Illini.

Mark of Fridays: Baby physics

A baby in happiness tends to stay in happiness, unless acted upon by another outside force. (Such as a barking dog.)

A baby in hysteria tends to stay in hysteria, unless acted upon by another outside force. (Such as a bottle.)

We are thankful for...

...family nearby.
...good friends.
...healthy babies and healthy mommies.
...the start of Illini basketball. And the end of Illini football.
...sleeping through the night. All of us.
...Grandma babysitters.
...good jobs.
...a safe, prosperous country.
...baseball. (Except the Yankees.)
...Diet Coke. Ah, sweet nectar.
...freedom of speech.

...Mark!

It's an abundance of riches this year, folks.

The two-month Mark

Mark Hanley, at two months

Best friends: My family, the doctors at Edward Hospital and any person holding a full bottle.

Enemies: Pyloric stenosis. Not that it's any match for me. Pyloric stenosis is a chump.

Insulted by: People who frown when they say they're feeling 2 feet tall. There's nothing wrong with being 2 feet tall. I should know. In fact, that could be the new way to say someone's awesome. "Look at Josh. He's engaged to that really cool girl. He must feel 2 feet tall."

I'm not so sure about: Thumb sucking. I hear a lot of other babies talking up thumb sucking, but I have no idea where this so-called "thumb" is. I prefer to just jam my whole fist in my mouth. It makes me feel 2 feet tall.
I'm also not so sure about: This Dad guy. A few weeks ago, he got stuck in the baby carrier. Is he certified to watch kids on his own? Can I see some documentation on that?
Favorite activities: I really like the smiling thing I came up with. I just thought it up and get this: it didn't even take me long to invent! Now, whenever I do it, so does everyone else! I knew I should have copyrighted it.

Things I don't like: Still not crazy about the people who take the bottle away. I mean once it's out of my mouth, it might never come back! It could be gone forever! Where is it? I need that bottle! Help! Why are you torturing me? Oh, there it is. Ahhhh.

I have a crush on: Car rides. Rev up that 23-mile-per-gallon engine on the Honda CRV and I sleep like, well, me.

Major accomplishments: I don't think it's any big deal, but Mom and Dad seem to pretty pumped that I slept eight hours straight one night. (If they're that easy to impress, high school should be a cake walk.) I handled surgery better than most adults. I'm slowly learning to lift up this giant melon they call a head. Oh, and the smiling.

Mark of Fridays: Thursday edition

Hey, look! It's Aunt Laura!

It was fun to meet Aunt Laura!

She's cool!

Mark of Fridays: Tested for maximum cuteness

Honestly - isn't that the best looking kid you've ever seen? C'mon.

If he uses that face when he asks for a pony, Lynne and Matt are in big trouble.

Mark of Fridays: Mark and Jack

Matt was very worried about having a little baby in the home with a little - and occasionally very jealous - dog.

Jack growls at Matt when he comes home from work and takes Lynne's attention away for a few seconds. Jack is rambunctious and Jack doesn't know anything about boundaries. It's cute for big people, but Matt wasn't so sure about little babies.

Matt warned Lynne that if there were any problems with Jack and Mark, then Jack was outta here.

"But he's just a dog," Lynne pouted. "He's like family."

Gimmie a break.

So Matt was tense when Jack finally came home to meet Mark. And for the first two days they were together, Jack sat under a chair, shaking in terror.

Matt was sure that would wear off. And it did. Sort of.

Jack is no longer scared of Little Mark. And for a while he didn't seem all that interested. He doesn't go near the baby, hardly ever. And he never puts a paw on him.
It appeared that Jack was disinterested in his new roommate. But then Matt left Mark in the car seat downstairs one day and ran upstairs to grab a burp cloth.

Mark started to let out a little cry. Jack leapt up to the landing between the first and second floor.

Jack looked at Matt. He barked.

Jack looked at Mark. He barked again.

Jack looked back at Matt. Bark.

Jack looked back at Mark. Bark.

Matt is not big on anthropomorphizing the dog, but it's pretty clear that he was worried about Mark and wanted to let Matt know something was happening. It was pretty darn cute.

So, apparently Matt will never be able to get rid of this dog.

Adventures in parenting

Lynne and Matt knew this parenting thing would be full of challenges and unexpected surprises. They just didn't know they would happen so soon.
As a few of you have heard by now, Mark was in the hospital last week. And he had a little surgery. Yeah, it kept us all awake for a while.
But, before we get any further, let's be clear: he is fine now. In fact, he's better than ever. As for his parents, well, this is just the beginning of visits to the Gray Hair Motel.
It started about three weeks ago. Mark had been wolfing down formula like they were discontinuing the stuff. Just a few weeks old, he was often eating 6 ounces in one sitting. Even the doctors were impressed.
Then he started throwing up. Not spitting up, but full-on, gagging, turning red, projectile vomiting everything in his stomach. It started as just once in a while, but within a day or two Mark was throwing up between six and 12 times a day. Lynne and Matt were doing a load of his laundry every day and using blankets as spit-up rags, just to keep up with the volume. As you can imagine from that disgusting description, it was hard on everyone.
Mark wasn't sleeping as much because he was always hungry. Lynne and Matt weren't sleeping much because they were terrified by the amounts he threw up and the ferocity that it spewed out. Lynne and Matt tried to convince themselves they were overreacting - that this was normal - but they suspected something was not right.
Of course, they took him to the doctor. Mark was still gaining weight, so the doctors weren't too concerned. They thought Mark had acid reflux, perhaps from the stress of knowing he could grow up to look like Matt. The doctors gave Lynne and Matt some cereal to add to Mark's formula and recommended a brand of bottles that would slow down how much he could eat.
It didn't make much difference. Still throwing up. Still hungry. Very little peeing and no poops. Lynne and Matt were at the end of their wits, worried about him, afraid to put him down.
So they brought him back to the doctor on Tuesday. He had lost about 12 ounces, which set off alarms. And, in case the doctors still had any questions, he puked on their table.
So, they took an ultrasound of his stomach and found that he had a relatively rare (3 in 1,000 babies) condition called pyloric stenosis. There's a pretty good diagram and definition here, but basically it means the pyloric muscle at the end of the stomach gets too big, so the food can't move to the intestine. It keeps backing up and then there's only one way out.
It happens more often in boys and more often in first born boys. No one seems to know why it happens to them, or why it happens at all.
The doctors saw all this in the ultrasound right away and told Lynne she had to take Mark to the hospital that day. The doctor said Mark would need surgery - maybe that night. Matt met them back at Edward Hospital. Of course, everyone was nervous, but they were comforted because the doctors were not panicked. They had seen this a million times before. No big deal.
So, Wednesday afternoon Mark went in for surgery. Were Lynne and Matt stressed? Of course. But if he didn't have the surgery, Mark would continue to dehydrate. And, the surgery was "routine" (a difficult word to swallow when they're prepping a 5-week-old) and lasted just 15 minutes. Plus, Lynne and Matt had watched Mark struggle for two weeks. If this could make him better, that was a good thing.
And you know what? It was a good thing. The surgery went off without a hitch. They thinned out the muscle and - presto - he's good as new. Maybe better. He has a scar no longer than a dime on his belly button. You can hardly see it now and by the time he's 1 years old, it will be virtually invisible.
In fact, the most traumatic part was watching them put the IV in Mark's head (see above picture). When he came into the hospital, Mark was too dehydrated to get an IV in his hands or feet. So they had to put it in his head. It didn't seem to bother him, but he looked like a Robot Baby.
In fact, through all of this - the IV in the head, the hospital stay, the surgery - Mark was the least upset of anyone. He responded great and was eating formula three hours after coming out of recovery. He took it all much better than his parents and grandparents. He's a tough little guy.
He's back up to 4 ounces of formula. He can sleep at night. He can lay on his stomach. He looks chubby again. He's smiling. Lynne and Matt have never been so happy to smell a poopy diaper. And he hasn't thrown up once.
It's like he went in for his 5-week tune up and now he's ready to race.
(Although the doctor's did point out that between the c-section and the pylroic stenosis, Mark is going to pretty elaborate lengths to be an only child.)
And Lynne and Matt were once again reminded how lucky they are to live in a time where this can be diagnosed and fixed within hours, reside in a country where brilliant doctors are minutes away and work at jobs with great insurance.
And once he finally got some sleep, Matt couldn't help but think about this surgery from the perspective of years later. Matt thought about Olympic coverage, when the announcers talk about some athlete who, when he was born, had some horrible malady. "The doctors told his parents he would never walk...but now he's winning the marathon!" or "His mother was devastated when surgeons told her the gills couldn't be removed...but now he's the world's greatest underwater swimmer!"
So, it's fair to assume that at the 2021 Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest, you may hear an announcer saying something like...
"At just 5 weeks old, Mark could no longer digest his food. But now he has eaten 54 hot dogs in 8 minutes. A new world record!"
And Lynne and Matt will be there, cheering, every hair on their head gray as concrete.

Boo!

Happy halloween!

For his first trip through trick-or-treat land, Mark had two costumes. On the left, Mark is wearing the monkey suit that his great-grandma got for him. You can't see it in this picture, but the costume even included a little tail!

On the right, was the costume that Aunt Megan made.

Can you guess what he is?

The first to guess correctly wins a free used diaper!

Yes, Matt is World Serious.

OK, so these World Series predictions are very late. But Matt had a good reason for being late. (More about that later.) You'll just have to take Matt at this word that he made these predictions before the Series started, not three games in.
So Matt picked the Phillies to win game one, followed by two Yankees victories...
Just kidding. Matt picked the Phillies in four. Which sounds bad because 1) it's clearly wrong, even at this point and 2) it sounds like Yankee hating. That second one isn't true. It's not Yankee hating, it's just faulty logic and bad hunches.
That being said, here's a recap of how we got here:
Matt picked one of the four first-round division championship matchups correct. Hooray!
Then, in the League Championship Series, Matt picked the Angels in seven and the Phillies in four. That's a .500 batting average. That would be an all-time record! Success! Or something like that.
And now the Yankees and Phillies are matched up. This is going to be a classic series. The Series is filled with great players amid two storied franchises. There are several positions where you could spend all month debating which player you'd rather have (Utley or Cano, Jeter or Rollins, Teixeira or Howard, Sabathia or Lee, Posada or Ruiz?). The starting staffs are excellent and both managers have different styles and strategies. It should be great, great baseball.
So Matt picks the Phillies in four. Why?
Well, Matt is picking the Phillies because he believes the team is just too deep. One through eight, the lineup never lets up. And the pitching has been dynamite - even the relievers.
Either way, Matt believes the key players in the Series are Cole Hamels and Alex Roidriguez. If Hamels can pitch like last year (he hasn't shown he can) then the Phillies will win, easily. If A-Rod continues to tear up pitchers (as he has in the first two rounds), the Yankees may be unstoppable.
So why Phils in Phour? This is all about bad instincts and nothing to do with good baseball logic. Matt has had A LOT of time to sit and watch baseball as he feeds Mark, burps Mark and tries to get Mark to go to sleep. In each round, there has been lots of bad serieses (seri?) but almost all great, close games.
So why not predict the trend will continue, even though - logically speaking - those past serieseseses are not a predictor for future results.
So Matt believes - for no solid reason - there will be four great games and the Phillies will have a little more in each one.
Which is clearly wrong.

Mark of Fridays: Fall colors

On a recent walk with Grandma and Grandpa Hanley

Mark of Fridays: Better know a Mark

Among the games at the baby shower, was a guessing game where all the attendees put in their best guesses about the Baby To Be Named Later.
So what did people think Mark would look like, smell like, act like? Let's take a look at the results and see if there's anyone we can take to the racetrack:

DATE OF BIRTH
Range of guesses: From Sept. 8 to Oct. 8
Most common guess: Three people chose Sept. 24 (Probably their birthday, Matt says.)
Correct answer: Linda Kelly was the only person to guess Sept. 20

TIME OF BIRTH
Midnight to 6 a.m. Seven guesses
6 a.m. to noon Four guesses
Noon to 6 p.m. Nine guesses
6 p.m. to midnight Two guesses
Most specific guess: 5:44 p.m.
Correct answer: Mark was born at 9:54 p.m.

HOURS OF LABOR
Range: 2 hours (with a note for Matt to be prepared) to 23 hours
Most common guess: Five people said Lynne would be in labor for 12 hours
Most specific guess: Matt's cousin Kalli guessed five hours, three minutes
Correct answer: Lynne was in labor for about 15 hours

GENDER
12 people guess boy
10 people guessed girl

WEIGHT
Range of guesses: 6 lbs, 8 oz to 9 lbs
Most common guess: Four people guessed 7.5 pounds
Correct answer: The chunky monkey weighed 8 lbs, 10 oz when he was born. Could have been worse. (Linda Kelly guessed that exactly, too.)

HEIGHT (OK, LENGTH)
Range: 3 inches to 22 inches
Most common guess: Five people guessed 20 inches
Correct answer: Majority rules - Mark was 20 inches when he was born

HAIR COLOR
Most common guess: Not suprisingly, 10 people guessed Mark would have red hair.
Also guessed: Brown (5), blonde (2), strawberry blonde (there's a difference), light brown, light brown with a hint of red, and red with black highlights (utero salon?)
Correct answer: When Mark was born, the doctors were commenting on how there was a very excited grandma in the lobby to see a red-headed baby. Matt looked at Mark and said: "Really? His hair is red? Looks brown to me." This remains an ongoing source debate and mystery. Most of the time his hair looks brown (regular brown, not light brown). But in the sun it looks red. So, perhaps the best answer really is light brown with a hint of red. Very good guess.

EYE COLOR
Most common guess: 14 people said the baby would have blue eyes
Other guesses: Brown (4), green (2) and hazel (2)
Correct answer: Apparently they're blue. Although they look gray to Matt. And black in the middle.

THE BABY WILL LOOK MOST LIKE...
15 people guessed Lynne
6 people guessed Matt
Also receiving votes: A baby, Naperville Mayor George Pradel
Correct answer: Matt could have been insulted by this lopsided vote. But everyone agrees: a baby that looks like Lynne is a good thing.

FIRST NAME (And, no, Lynne and Matt hadn't told anyone at all. Not even Jack.)
Guesses: Michael (3), Barry (2), Stanley (2), Sara (2) Mark Stewart, Diane, Sara, Timothy, Anne Leigh, Carol Lynne, Madeline, Matt, Baby (nearly happened), Amber, Emily, Abigail, Rosebud, Sean, Luke, Sophie
Correct guesser: Lynne's sister Laura guessed both the first and middle name. Pretty impressive.

The one-month Mark

Mark Hanley, at one month

Best friends: My Mom and Dad. My Grandmas and Grandpas. My Aunts.
Enemies: Anyone who takes away my bottle before I'm finished. People who do that are lunatics or morons.
I'm not so sure about: Jack, the dog.
Favorite place: In mom's arms.
Things I like: Eating my bottle as fast as possible. Sleeping for random increments of time. Bright lights.
Things I don't like: People who take away my bottle. Why would they do that? Why would they ever take away the wonderful, sweet bliss that is the bottle? Why? What is wrong with them? Are they crazy?
I have a crush on: My binky (green only).
Major accomplishments: Maximized my cuteness levels. Disconnected from my umbilical cord. Learned to make both my eyes move in the same direction, most of the time. Once urinated on my own head.

Mark of Fridays: Sleepy time

So, when the public finds out you had a baby, they all want to know: is he sleeping well?
Well...that's a tough question. Is Mark sleeping well? He closes his eyes when he sleeps. And he doesn't try any sleepwalking. So, that's good because walking around with your eyes open does not qualify as sleeping well.
But, it's fair to say everyone is still figuring out good sleep. On Sunday night, Mark slept for SEVEN STRAIGHT HOURS. Lynne and Matt were shocked. They started to get excited. Had he figured it out already? Were they on Easy Sleep Street in less than a month?
Well, the next night Mark slept for about an hour straight. Lynne's been trying to help out as much as she can because Matt's back at work. But it's led to some long, strange nights. Consider: At around 2:30 a.m. Thursday morning, Mark puked all over Lynne's shirt. Nasty, gross smelling puke. So she thrust Mark into Matt's semi conscious arms while she ran around gagging. It is not underestimating to say Matt was thoroughly confused.
Matt is having enough problems without these mid-night gag-and-puke fests. At least once or twice an evening Matt sits straight up in bed, convinced he just dropped Mark out of his arms. Matt starts scrambling around the bed, pulling up covers, looking under pillows...until Lynne has to convince him that Mark is just fine and she forces him to look in the car seat. (Yes, he's still sleeping in his car seat.)
And...earlier in the puke-and-gag night, Lynne woke up to find Matt burping her belly in his sleep. She really appreciated that. And at some point Matt stubbed his toe so badly it was bleeding.
So, anyhow, back to Matt holding puke-covered Mark. They're both disoriented and one of them is crying. (Your guess on which one.) Eventually, everything gets sorted out. Mark goes back to sleep and Lynne gets a new shirt.
But in the morning, Matt wakes up ... in another room! Sleeping on a recliner! He doesn't remember when or why he went into that room. And they don't even have a recliner!
OK, they do have recliner, but that would have been really crazy if they didn't.
So, in honor of bedtime, enjoy two pictures of Mark sleeping. And if look very closely (it's on the letter 'I'), you can see the chocolate ice cream that fell on Matt's shirt as he ate over his child's head. Classy.

The day Mark was born

Matt has been meaning to give a little more context to the day Mark arrived. Matt's been meaning to get on the computer and add more pictures of this beautiful little boy. Matt's been meaning to organize his thoughts on this whole crazy adventure that’s only just started.
But, geez, these babies are really time consuming. They actually want to eat every day. And be changed, more than once a day. Who knew?
But we'll try to tell you a little about the day that Mark was born.

Something's happening!
Sunday, Sept. 20, started for Lynne at around 6:30 a.m. when she felt like she had to go to the bathroom. Or was it contractions? She wasn't sure. She used the bathroom and the pressure was still there. That left only one option. So, she ate a little breakfast, waited a little while longer (to make sure), then decided to wake up Matt.
"Matt," she said, gently shaking him. "Honey."
"Hmmm..grmblphjf."
"Matt…"
"Slruvurvlupmh."
"Matt. Something's happening..."
"What?! Oh my God! Is there gas in the car? I'll go get air in the tires. Did we pack the bags? Where are the plugs for the phone?"
Matt then proceeded to run around the house, trying to remember...anything at all. He would have settled for what was supposed to go into Lynne’s bag, how far apart the contractions were supposed to be before they went to the hospital, or simply the names they had picked for their child. Any thoughts would been helpful.
Instead, he ran around the house like a lunatic, picking up things and trying to decide if they would need them at the hospital. The computer? A lamp? The dog? Of course, whenever he would be in sight of Lynne, he would walk cool and slow, like everything was normal. She was totally fooled.

Off to the hospital
When Lynne woke Matt, the contractions were between 12 and 17 minutes apart. They were irregular and not terribly painful. The magic number to go to the hospital was a steady five minutes apart. So, they waited.
Matt got gas, loaded the bags in the car and called the soon-to-be grandparents and aunts. Meanwhile, the contractions kept coming - more often and more painful. Lynne said they felt like a giant rubber band tightening up around her waist.
By 9:30 a.m., Lynne was doubled over on the stairs, waiting out 30- to 60-second-long contractions that were coming steadily every three or four minutes. It was at this point that Matt forgot the few remaining facts still rattling around in his oversized skull. The lessons from the classes they had taken were gone. His address - vanished. The ability to tell a house key from a car key - inaccessible.
It was terrible watching his wife in pain, knowing there's nothing he could do about it. Obviously, viewing is preferable to being the person actually in pain, but it was a helpless and useless feeling. It would only get much, much more uncomfortable.

She's having a baby!
The drive to the hospital was interesting. Matt drove down major streets of Naperville at parade float speed. Old ladies were honking at him and one may have flipped the bird. And, although they had driven there two dozen times or more, and despite the fact that it was less than three miles from their home, Matt could not remember how to get to the hospital. But, of course, they made it in one piece, because Lynne was cool and collected.
Matt dropped Lynne at the front door, parked the car and then came back to walk her in. Once inside, Matt announced to three very startled candy stripers behind the desk: “She’s having a baby!”
Then, these high school kids ran around grabbing wheelchairs, acting nervous and flustered. In retrospect, maybe these kids shouldn’t have been so surprised, since many mothers-to-be come in the same door and Lynne’s belly was a significant clue. (“She swallowed a basketball!” “She’s ate way too much Jello-o!”)
But, for a moment, it was just like the movies.
After being wheeled to the fourth floor, Lynne went to an admitting nurse who had to determine whether she was far enough along to stay at the hospital. Well, Lynne was doubled over in pain unable to talk, kneeling on the floor and dilated to 5 centimeters - half way to Baby Town. So, everyone got to stay.
Then, the hospital began to torture Lynne. Of course, they weren't really picking on her. In fact, Matt and Lynne have nothing but compliments for Edward Hospital. But once she was admitted, nurses started poking and prodding Lynne - an IV shoved in her arm; a monitor above and below her belly; a woman pushing on her stomach. The contractions were hitting full force.
Again, Matt stood on the sidelines, feeling fine, watching the torture, trying to decide whether Lynne might later think it was fun to have some video footage of this. (She wouldn't, so he didn't.)

An epidural decision
By 11:45 a.m., they moved Lynne over to the luxury birthing suite, a huge room with a shower, full size couch and a flat screen TV. The contractions were really bad at this point. It would be many more hours before anyone understood why.
Lynne was pale, sweating and clearly in agony. Coming in, Lynne had made a plan to hold off on getting an epidural for as long as possible. Lynne and Matt had watched a surprisingly good documentary called The Business of Being Born, which talked about how the increase in interventions (like epidurals) has lead to more C-sections - something Lynne was desperately trying to avoid. (The theory goes that an epidural to ease pain also slows down contractions, so then doctors give pitocin to induce or speed up contractions. The battling drugs lead to fetal distress, then a C-section.)
Throughout the pregnancy, Matt wondered: what will childbirth feel like? Is it worse than breaking a leg? How much worse is it than having your appendix out? Does it compare to running a marathon? Well, Matt hasn't had a contraction and Lynne hasn't run a marathon, but from Matt's perspective running looks like tiddlywinks.
So, Lynne got the epidural. At the time, she felt like she had let herself down, that she had caved, that she had maybe even slowed down the process. She was upset with herself.
But, boy, did she feel good. The color immediately came back to her cheeks. She could talk. She made jokes. She chatted with the nurse, who predicted the baby would be born before her shift ended at 7 p.m.
And Lynne didn't feel a thing below her hips. The pain vanished. And, best of all, the contractions continued. By checking the monitors on her stomach, doctors could tell she was still having strong, regular contractions. But no pain. Thank you, science.
From that point, the day finally seemed to slow down a little. Lynne continued to dilate and her readings looked good. By 2 p.m., Lynne actually said she was bored. Without much to do, Matt was breathing easier and watched the end of the Bears game.
And by then, the Hanleys, the Seagos, Megan and Leslie were out in the waiting room. Matt was keeping them and Lynne’s sister Laura (who lives in Florida) up-to-date with text messages. In the tiny waiting room, everyone's phone would buzz with an alert. Matt saved the messages so you can get a feel for what happened next:
10:35 a.m. off to the hospital
12:16 p.m. She’s doing good. She’s at five.
2:04 p.m. Seven centimeters. Water still hasn’t broke. Everyone’s doing good.
3:22 p.m. Not much to report here. Lynne still has her water.
4:09 p.m. Nine centimeters!! Water still hasn’t broke. Lynne’s doing great.
5:58 p.m. No news to report here.
6:04 p.m. Thanks for the team spirit. Lynne’s doing great. Say hi to everyone.
6:13 p.m. Water just broke. Head is down. Doc is on the way!
But then...nothing.
For an hour, then two hours. The families waited in the lobby with no word from Matt or Lynne or the doctors. At first, no one was surprised because they assumed everyone was in the middle of some heavy duty work. But when it went past two hours, people started to stir.
The sisters - who don’t have kids - asked if this long of a wait was normal. The moms were worried.
They knew from 9.5 to 10 centimeters is the fastest part of labor. But there were no calls. No text messages. Not even a carrier pigeon. Just silence.

In the room
Throughout Lynne's pregnancy Matt didn't find himself daydreaming much about the baby. He didn't know the gender or what he/she would look like, so it was too abstract for him to imagine. But, he did think a lot about the day they would go to the hospital. Besides the anxiety, Matt visualized seeing the baby for the first time, after Lynne's hard work. He pictured holding the little guy or girl with Lynne, during the new family’s first moments. He thought about introducing the baby to his/her grandparents.
Things didn't quite go that way, despite Lynne's best efforts. Not long after that last text message, Lynne began pushing. Modesty was long gone and it was time to get this baby out. Now.
They backed off the epidural so she could feel the contractions.

Matt held the right leg, and a very sweet but annoying nurse held the left. The nurse would wait for the contractions to start and then - in a high, cutesy voice - say:
"And pushpushpushpushpush! two three four five six seven eight nine ten.”
Lynne would take a breath.
“And pushpushpushpushpushpush! two three four five six seven eight nine ten."
This went on for half an hour, then the doctor would come in and check. Sorry, no progress. Lynne changed positions, laying on her side.
Pushpushpushpushpushpush! two three four...
Ten more minutes.
Nothing.
An hour passed and this baby had not budged. Each time the lovely and talented Dr. Frangella (at right) checked, you could see the disappointment on her face. Lynne became more and more determined. Matt could see the sweat pooling up on her neck as he held her oxygen mask in place. Pushpushpushpushpushpush! two three four...
Ten more minutes.
Nothing.
And then Dr. Frangella started to get worried. The baby's heart rate was rising during the contractions, which was normal. But it was dipping too low between contractions, which was concerning.
She gave Lynne 10 more minutes to make progress."We're on C-section prevention here," Lynne said as she shifted.
Pushpushpushpushpushpush! two three four... 10 minutes passed. Dr. Frangella looked nervous and looked at Lynne. Lynne asked for 10 more minutes.
Pushpushpushpushpushpush! two three four...
Nothing.
No movement.
Dr. Frangella apologized and assured Lynne she had one of the lowest C-section rates in the hospital. But it was time to try something different. This baby was not budging.
She offered Lynne and Matt five minutes together to talk things over. But what choice did they have? The doctors came back into the room, Lynne said she was ready. People descended on the room like there was a rum raid, swarming in through both doors.
“I’m here to pack your belongings!” “Dad, I need you to put on this body suit, hair net and surgical mask.” “Mom, I’m here to shave you.” “I need to put these socks on your feet.” “I’m here to hook up a monitor.” “Drink this.” “Wear this.” “Wash this.”
Matt had seen a lot of emotions on Lynne's face that day, but this was first time he had seen her look scared.

Baby Boy Hanley
We'll spare you most of the details of the C-section other than to say it was, of course, a difficult for everyone involved. Matt was never so proud and thinks Lynne is the toughest lady he ever met.
Lynne was wheeled into the operating room with her arms strapped down. The doctors did a great job and Lynne was lucid long enough to hear a little cry and hear the doctor say: "It's a boy."
Then, the doctor upped the pain medication and Lynne slipped off to one of the levels of Super Mario Land.
Between seeing his wife in pain and the arrival of a boy, it was very emotional for Matt. It had been a long day - it was almost 10 p.m. when Mark finally arrived - and an exhausting one. So, when the doctors asked Matt what the baby's name was, but he wouldn't tell them.
He didn't want to tell the doctors. That was a moment he imagined sharing with Lynne and the grandparents. In a fit of irrational exhaustion, he decided not to answer. And that’s how everything at the hospital ended up labeled "Baby Boy Hanley." Which is not a very creative name.
Matt did come over to take a look at this freshest Hanley. He had big strong shoulders, like he had been working out in the womb, using mom's bladder as a punching bag. The doctors said he had red hair, but Matt didn't think so. Matt did notice Mark had almost comically large feet, a little blood on his face and a bruise on his right eyelid from the move.
He wasn’t crying much, but he was sticking his tiny tongue out, like he was tasting the air for the first time.
Seeing your son is probably supposed to be a magical moment, but it felt peculiar. Matt didn't feel like a dad and this tiny little boy still felt like a stranger. Lynne wasn’t really conscious and doesn’t remember when the doctor’s brought him over.
But Mark was here.
Lynne stayed in recovery and - after a quick, kind lecture from a nurse - Matt pulled himself together to make it out to the waiting room. The newest grandparents and aunts in Illinois got to meet the shortest Hanley in the hospital hallway for about 10 minutes.
The others probably have some great memories of this, but it was all a blur for Matt. Seeing the picture looks foreign - like it was taken of someone else. It was wonderful and confusing. Little Mark stared up at the ceiling while the grandmas snapped the first of 1 million pictures. Big Mark Hanley hugged all the family members, a nurse and maybe a janitor.
Matt finally felt some relief. He nearly knocked himself out jumping up and down.

A dusky baby
Lynne's recovery went fine, but there were still other hurdles. After all that work, Mark was finally delivered to the hospital room around 1 a.m. Lynne started to feed him for the first time when the nurse abruptly said Mark looked "dusky" and whisked him away.
Mark then spent about 24 hours in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, hooked up to monitors and an IV. It was a tough time, especially for Lynne. Mark was a big baby - 8 pounds, 10 ounces - and he didn’t really belong among the other babies. That’s not to say the hospital made a mistake bringing him there, but he never showed any of the oxygenation problems he showed that first night, when he was trying to eat too fast.
It was hard for a new mom to hold her son attached to at five wires while she was in a wheelchair, wearing a surgical mask - did we mention Lynne had a nasty cold when she came into the hospital? Yeah, great timing.
But Mark never looked back. His x-rays were fine and his oxygen levels were awesome. Lynne and Matt felt like frauds in the NICU, next to three pound “premies” who were really struggling and alongside parents who came every day after work to look at their child sitting in an incubator.
By Tuesday Mark was up in the room with Lynne and Matt, finally a family.

Sunny side up

And so what had caused all the trouble?
Well, babies are supposed to come out facing “down”. But Mark was sunny side up and was trying to lead essentially face first. His forehead was getting pushed back and his neck was getting stretched. So, his larger-than-average head got jammed up. After the C-section, the doctors said he would never have been able to get out. Lynne had made the right choice.

It wasn't fun, but Lynne and Matt are very lucky. If this had been another time, or another place in the world, an uncomfortable surgery might not have been an option. Scars aren’t fun, but they heal. Lynne’s already feeling much better.
As for Mark? Well, sunny side up is not the best way to start life, but a great way to live the rest of it.

Matt would have picked the South, too

Which is more amazing?

That Matt predicted just one of four round one baseball playoff series correct?

Or, that a .250 prediction average represents Matt a significant improvement in his prognostication abilities from last year, when he missed all seven playoff series?

Yep, the Phillies just finished off the Rockies making Matt 1-for-4 in the first round of the playoffs. None of the first-round series were very good, but many of the individual games were excellent - particularly the last game of the Angels-Red Sox series. Fascinating baseball.

First, let's look back at Matt's predictions:
Yankees and Twins
Matt's pick: Yankees in three. "The Twins had to play an extra game that went extra innings less than a day before this series starts; the Yankees have C.C. Sabathia..."

Amazingly, the Yankees swept and C.C. Sabathia was a key. Now, before you start thinking Matt knows anything about anything...

Red Sox vs. Angels

Matt's pick: Sox in five. "Just a hunch, but maybe this comes down to the relievers and maybe the Angels regret letting K-Rod get away. No offense to Brian Fuentes, but Papelbon is one of the best out there."

Wow - could not have been more wrong. Fuentes was outstanding and Papelbon got blown up.

Dodgers vs. Cardinals

Matt's pick: Cardinals in three. "The Dodgers don't have enough starting pitching to match up with the Cardinals. And they're slumping down the stretch. Wainwright, Carpenter, Pujols and Holliday are more than enough."
Well, who knew Matt Holliday would try to catch balls with his...cup? This one was the biggest surprise, for Matt.

Phillies vs. Rockies

Matt's pick: Rockies in five. "Ubaldo Jiminez completes his rise to superstar pitcher against the Phils."

Admittedly, Matt was playing a hunch here because the Rockies were rolling. Jiminez was good, not great. Matt's picks were putrid, not bad.

But why should that stop him from Round Two prognosticating?

Yankees vs. Angels

Comment: It's ironic that the Yankees - the most evil force in the world (except Jeter and Rivera) - are playing a team of Angels. Good vs. evil. Who would possibly side with evil? Except the Yankees are an excellent team. But maybe a seven-game series favors the Angels rotation, which is a bit deeper than the Yankees, on paper. What will be most fun to watch is Abreu and Jeter - two of the best and most underrated players - taking their at bats in this series.

Matt's prediction: Oh, like it matters who Matt picks. It's hard to pick against a team with Sabathia, Pettitte and Rivera, but Matt isn't sold on any of the other Yankee pitchers. A-Rod could be the key. If he stays hot, that might be too much for the Angels to overcome. But Matt says the Angels have enough pitching and Torii Hunter to get by. Angels in seven.

Dodgers and Phillies

Comment: If Matt has a theory in the first round and it fails, does that make the theory faulty? Should he see the first round failure as a fluke or a precusor? All that rhetoric is directed at the Dodgers starting pitching. Randy Wolf, Chad Billingsley and Clayton Kershaw? All talented, but none dominant. They can't possibly have enough to get by the defending champs, right?

Matt's prediction: You just want to know, so you can lay odds the other way, right? Even if you ignored Cliff Lee and Cole Hamels, the Phillies have way too many bats. Matt has really learned to appreciate how talented Ryan Howard (pictured above, blurry) is, and how much fun it is watching him play. Utley, Werth and Victorino aren't too shabby, either. Phillies in four.

Enjoy the Dodgers-Yankees World Series!

The Mark of Fridays

For your viewing pleasure!

Stretching and first bath.

That's exactly how Matt looks during a bath.

We interrupt this birth for baseball season

We'll take a very brief break from babies to re-visit the Major League baseball playoffs. The regular season wrapped up in fine form when the Twins finished out the postseason roster, beating the Tigers in 12 innings.

Now, of course, you'll remember that last season Matt swept through the playoffs, predicting every single series - up to and including the World Series - incorrectly. Honestly, that's not easy to do.

OK, so the playoffs start today. Last year, Matt was lucky enough to seven of the eight playoff teams in person. This year, he "only" saw one of the teams play in person - he caught a Dodgers game when he visited Alex this summer.

However, he has visited the stadiums of six of the eight teams playing this year. So, you can take these predictions to the bank.

Yankees vs. Twins

Comment: Is there anything to like about the Yankees? Their overpriced stadium, their overpaid and whiny players (except for Jeter and Rivera), their overhyped team - it all stinks. Is there anything not to like about the Twins? Their hustle, Joe Mauer, Joe Nathan, their grit, their smarts - it's all beautiful.
Prediction: Matt's heart wants to pick the Twins because they are so fun to watch and the Yankees are all that is evil. But: 1) the Twins had to play an extra game that went extra innings less than a day before this series starts; 2) the Yankees have C.C. Sabathia; 3) the Twins have Carl Pavano. Yankees in three.

Red Sox vs. Angels

Comment: This is probably the best match up in the first round. There's great offense everywhere - Papi, Youkilis, Bay, Vlad, Abreu, Hunter - but the pitching is the real story. Weaver, Saunders, Lackey, Santana and Kazmir against Beckett, Lester, Buchholz, Penny and Dice-K. Dynamite.
Prediction: Just a hunch, but maybe this comes down to the relivers and maybe the Angels regret letting K-Rod get away. No offense to Brian Fuentes, but Papelbon is one of the best out there. Sox is five.

Dodgers vs. Cardinals
Comment: This will be a fun series, maybe one that Matt will later tell Mark that he got to watch Manny go up against Pujols and hot dogs used to cost a nickel. Two of the greatest clutch hitters of all time, facing off. And two of the great baseball managers facing off. Besides the Twins, Matt will probably be rooting for the Dodgers to get the Series, just so ultimate good guy Jim Thome can finally get a championship at bat.
Prediction: The Dodgers don't have enough starting pitching to match up with the Cardinals. And they're slumping down the stretch. Wainwright, Carpenter, Pujols and Holliday is more than enough. Cardinals in three.

Phillies vs. Rockies

Comment: Interesting match-up here. The defending champs against the upstarts with experience. The Phillies were never really challenged this season and they have excellent starting pitching. And yet, something makes Matt wary of them. The Rockies have all the mojo heading into the playoffs and plenty of clutch hitters and pitchers. And yet, something makes Matt wary of them.
Prediction: Playing another hunch here, but Matt says Ubaldo Jiminez completes his rise to superstar pitcher against the Phils. Matt will take the upset special, with the Rockies winning in five.

So, if you're a betting man, that's: Twins, Angels, Dodgers and Phillies.